James 3 " The tongue", James says, " is a fire, the very world of iniquity; the tongue is set among our members as that which defiles the entire body, and sets on fire the course of our life, and is set on fire by hell." 

Jesus said this, " You brood of vipers, how can you, being evil, speak what is good? for the mouth speaks out of that which fills the heart. The good man out of his good treasure brings forth what is good; and the evil man out of his evil treasure brings forth what is evil.  And I say to you, that every careless word that men shall speak, they shall render account for it in the day of judgement.  For by your words you shall be justified, and by your words you shall be condemned." ( Matthew 12:34-37)

James' words about blessing and cursing that come from the same mouth, bitter and sweet water from the same fountain, and olives and figs from the same tree.. remind me of what Jesus was talking about in Matthew 12 "... the tree is known by its fruit".  In Matthew 7 Jesus said "You will know them by their fruits.  Grapes are not gathered from thorn bushes, nor figs from thistles, are they? Even so, every good tree bears good fruit; but the bad tree bears bad fruit. A good tree cannot produce bad fruit, nor can a bad tree produce good fruit.  Every tree that does not bear good fruit is cut down and thrown into the fire. So then, you will know them by their fruits." ( v16-20)

We can only control our tongues when we have a pure heart.  James goes on to say that when our hearts are filled with "jealousy and selfish ambition" that we are acting out of an "earthly, natural, demonic" wisdom.   What we really need is "the wisdom from above"; that which is "first pure, then peaceable, gentle, reasonable, full of mercy and good fruits, unwavering, without hypocrisy." 

With this kind of wisdom we can "show by [our] good behavior.. deeds in the gentleness of wisdom". 

Father in heaven, give to us this wisdom from above, so that we might do what is good and bear good fruit to the glory of our Savior.  Remind us that our words matter.  May we have that gift of Your Spirit.. self-control,  to control our tongues, to speak words that are gentle and bring peace.. to our spouses, our children, our grandchildren.. and to all those we come into contact with today.  Give us Your grace gift of godly wisdom today, we ask in the name of Jesus our Lord and great High Priest. Amen.