Ephesians 6
Verses 1-4  Children are commanded to honor their parents.. this is one of the 10 foundational commands that God gave Israel.  Paul says, "Children obey your parents in the Lord, for this is right.."  To "honor" is to give worth to.. it is an attitude that elevates the parent over the child, as the authority. The child is to subject himself to the parents "headship".  The practical application would be obedience.  This is God's will for the family... in Him.   But, then Paul adds a second thought, perhaps a warning.. "And, fathers do not provoke your children to anger..."  In Col. 3:21 this is written, "Fathers, do not exasperate your children, that they may not lose heart."   

We commonly take this to mean that fathers need to be careful not to be overly harsh or to discourage their children by their impossible standards, but, could  it be more than that?  The thought that comes to my mind is that fathers and mothers need to be diligent to not lead their children into wrathful living.. into unrestrained anger or violent and unhealthy emotional outbursts.  We must be the examples... having the fruit of self-control our own-selves.. and be teachers, coming along side them and helping them to deal with anger.  We can see this clearly in our own every day dealings with people.  A father who has "anger issues", who may be abusive or destructive, will pass that along to his children.  It happens all the time. Most abusers have been abused.  Likewise, if we see a father who has learned healthy ways to deal with anger, who has self-control and who teaches his children by words and actions... that child will not "lose heart" or be exasperated or "provoked to anger".

God has given us the means to do exactly this, " .. but bring them up in the discipline and instruction of the Lord."   Instruction - calling attention to, giving warning, or mildly rebuking.    In Genesis 18:19 the Lord says this about Abraham, " For I have chosen him in order that he may command his children and his household after him to keep the way of the Lord by doing righteousness and justice;..."  As the parents teach their children God's Word and His ways, raising them to follow the Lord and walk a worthy walk, then anger and exasperation will be dealt with and instead the blessing will be given, for God's Word for those who honor their parents is "That it may be well with you, and that you may live long on the earth".  

Father in Heaven,  You are the perfect Father who loves us and Who never provokes us to anger. As Your children we are given all that we need to live blessed lives instead of cursed, wrath-filled lives.  Thank You.  We honor You and bless Your holy Name.  Forgive us our sins and failures, especially in this area of uncontrolled anger.  Heal us and heal our children, O Lord!  See the great need in our world today and send forth workers into Your harvest field we pray.  Amen.